TeXocial TOP TEN Tuesday: Surviving the Company Holiday Party With Dignity

There is always at least one asshole at the company Christmas party. Here are our TOP TEN TIPS on making it through the party with your dignity and reputation in tact.

The GOLDEN RULE: DO NOT GET DRUNK! Just because the booze is free and the ties are loosened does not mean you have to pound drinks with your co-workers. Being the drunk at the office party will NEVER lead to good things.

WEAR APPROPRIATE CLOTHING AND KEEP THEM ON: Keep your boobs holstered and your pants up. An office party is not an excuse to show your co-workers how sexy you can be.

EAT BEFORE YOU GO: You don’t want to have anything to drink on an empty stomach or look like a glutton.

DON’T GET TOO FRIENDLY with your co-workers. Do not say anything you wouldn’t say during business hours. Keep the hidden crush, judgments, and secrets to yourself and you will thank yourself in the morning. Not following tip #1 will make this more difficult.

STAY OFF OF SOCIAL MEDIA! Do not post pics of you or your co-workers doing anything! This is just asking for trouble. Put your phone away and leave it there until you are calling your Uber!

DO SOME NETWORKING. Office parties are a good time to talk with people you normally wouldn’t BUT ONLY IF YOU ARE NOT DRUNK!

DO NOT GET FRISKY! Keep it professional people. No sexy dancing, flirting with interns, or one on one time in the copy room.

Keep an eye out for those making assholes of themselves and steer clear. They are tornados and will destroy all those in their path.

LEAVE EARLY! Have one or two drinks and your risk of embarrassing yourself drastically decreases.

DON’T BE THE ASSHOLE OF THE PARTY. Don’t talk politics or religion. PERIOD. Don’t tell Jan she has nice boobs. Don’t twerk on a desk. Keep the profanity to a minimum and a 2 drink max. Someone will be the butt of jokes all year because of how they acted at the party. If you can follow the majority of these tips, it won’t be you.